A Decisive Mind

Well! Suffice to say that the last week or so has been pretty busy. I've had to decide a lot about what I'm going to be doing for the next several months of my life. Big life choices call for much careful consideration and deliberation. Having been offered a job right before the weekend, I reflected on how my mother taught me to pick the very best one. With meditation, I was able to distance myself from that feeling of anxiety you get when you've gotten hold of a fierce feline by one of it's digits and must release it lest it wriggle right out of your grasp. By Sunday, I'd landed firmly on a decision and could finally relax with the knowledge that I'd made my choice (and also, the reassuring fact that y-o-u always spells 'you').

However, the past week or so has been one celebrated with a multitude of photography sessions! My trip up North presented me with plenty of opportunities for photographs and I tried to take advantage of them all! I also got pretty badly sunburned but that's nearly finished by now...

I've been kind of experimenting with a softer feel

to my photographs. I'm finding it pleasant!

Really though, the place we stayed (this beautiful lodge right outside of Frankfurt, Michigan on Crystal Lake) was fantastically beautiful. I've never seen such clear, clean water. The atmosphere around the water was one of restfulness and it was rather difficult to entertain the idea of actually leaving the cool sand underfoot. The first night that we arrived at the lodge, after eating at a nearby small restaurant, my sister and I walked down the hill from our lodge out to the beach. It had been rather dim when we'd originally arrived and there now, it was pretty dark so we weren't really able to take in how beautiful the water and surrounding areas were. However, the stars were vast and riddled with streaking flashes of light (we weren't entirely sure what these were...shooting stars? meteor shower?). We sat out on the beach just staring upwards for a while. I always forget the soothing surge of water breathing up over land. It's so constant and smooth and it manifests within your body, drawing visceral circles of natural connectivity. Anyway, it was beautiful and we thoroughly enjoyed our time there. It was sad to leave on Sunday and I definitely hope to return someday soon!

On that note, I take my leave of you. I'm having a theoretical argument with myself in my journal and have to reinforce one of my opinions to...myself...

The Hazzards of Knitting.

My music is randomly shuffling. This makes me quickly realize how many awful CD's I loaded onto there from working at the radio station! I need to clean iTunes up...

Let's kick this off with my newest comic! See if you can spot the Jack Nicholson reference!

Knit, knit, knit, knit, redrum.

I really have been doing a lot of knitting recently, though (although killing everyone in my immediate vicinity hasn't yet become my aim. Yet). I woke up about a week ago and realized that life was going to move slowly no matter what I did. My solution? Start working on an involved knitting project that would take me hours and hours of my life to go through before completion. It's working for me!

Things I'm looking forward to:

-An extended weekend trip with my sister that begins tomorrow! This includes swimming, music-playing, lots of reading, photography, yoga, kayaking, writing, goofing off with hermana numero dos, hiking all over sleeping bear dunes, and all other sisterly mayhem we can muster up (can anyone say dressing up like a hooker and visiting the library/video rental store/christmas choir performance? Yes. Yes we can).

-Packing for said trip (nearly as fun as leaving for the trip because it makes you realize all the fun stuff you'll be doing!).

-A nice morning run

tomorrow

, also with hermana numero dos.

-A new song to come onto iTunes; preferably one that doesn't make me want to wash all the dye out of every bright piece of clothing I own.

-The end of August, which is only 14 days away! It'll all be over before we know it!

-Finishing my current writing piece.

And on that subject, I have decided that my current writing project needs to be cut a bit shorter than I originally planned. I started taking it in this new, long-winded direction and it's just lost a lot of the luster that it used to have. I'm going to re-direct it and then cut out a lot of the boring stuff that was clogging up the middle parts. Hopefully this improves everything! Sometimes, you just need to face the facts and rip out a lot of stuff that really isn't working. For me, that's the whole middle part. But hey! That's just like when you're about to eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and you realize that all you want is the crust! Wait...

So, today, I went out to the Botanical Gardens and shot some photos. I was pretty happy to get out and capture some images again. I think it was a mostly successful trip, too! I'll post my favorites from the day so you can ogle my talent, basically.

Hopefully, my next update will include lots of stories from a successful and not rained-upon weekend trip!

Outside Art

This morning, I got up, shook off my sleep, and gathered materials for an interesting excision. I wasn't entirely sure what I'd need for this art experience. I do a lot of art and I'm usually relatively sure what I'll use during any given project but this was a first for me. Well (if not over) equipped, I set out for Wildwood park. I found some thick hiking boots from the trunk of my car*, laced them up, and hauled my needed equipment with me away from the parking lot. I walked till I found the perfect spot (also known as the distance I could carry the heavy easel in my right hand before I set it down and said "I don't care what the hell is in front of me, it's gonna be art!") and set everything up!

The easel I have is very old and rather rickety. It also doesn't have an instructions manual (this made for a fun three hours of aggravated splinters and uneven legs the night before as I tried to convince the damn thing to stand!). However, with only a few moments of muffled cursing, I was able to get it upright. Thus standing, I actually took a look at what was in front of me: an absurd amount of leaves.

"Great!" I thought. "I know how to draw a leaf!"

Yes, dear. But do you know how to draw 23,472,774 leaves?

I did a very light and general sketch of the landscape before me (which, like I said before, was mostly of the leafy nature) and then set down my pencil and picked up my brush. I do quite a bit of painting but never in my life have I attempted water color. I do have a rather shining memory from my youth of sitting on the back steps of my house hovered over a Cinderella "water color" book. I watched in amazement as I dipped my brush into water and as I spread it across the page, Cinderella's dress magically turned blue. In the back of my mind somewhere, the phrase "It can't be that different" popped up. Despite the joy I got out of this clearly talented endeavor from my youth, it did not really prepare me for honest water coloring. My first attempt drowned my paint block in water. I dipped my paintbrush in it and spread it meticulously across the page. The paper blushed with the light suggestion of blue. I squinted to see if I'd actually made a difference or if that was, in fact, some lucky shade that the rest of me wasn't getting.

"Okay, so it needs to be thicker, right?" I thought.

I dabbed my brush right in there, swirling it all over the water and the color block and brought it to the paper with panache. Bam! Everything was absurdly blue. Overkill! Thankfully, water color is the most forgiving process in art that I've seen yet. You just get your brush damp with clear water (but not soaking) and you spread that overkill of color out and it will honestly listen to you. Try telling regular paint to be less intensely paint-y (hint: you'll have no luck with this)!

In the end, I basically just dabbled in water color. I know that if I want to be actually good at it, I'll have to work on mixing the colors more intricately and working with a multitude of brushes to help me get the right depth. As it were, when I began to grow tired of the water color, it looked like a five year old had had a hand party all over my page. I wasn't that impressed. Neither were the people passing by me on the path and getting all judge-y over my first attempt at this wateriest of arts. It is rather nerve-wrecking doing art out in the open where anyone can come up to you and say something like, "Is that a leaf or a hand? No really..." When people are walking around in the park and they see someone working avidly over an easel, you have to admit that they probably think you must be somewhat good at art. If you go out and buy a nice easel, it probably means that the quality of your art deserves such representation. Therefore, when you pass by an artist whose work looks like some kind of epidemic of mold growing slowly over their canvas, it doesn't look so good. It was definitely time to step up my game.

Here's a hint: when you do art, unless you are some mystical genius at it, there's going to be a long portion of time where it looks like an utter mess of disgusting failure (I'm being generous here. You should hear me when I'm actually painting). If you give up at that point, you will amass a slew of grotesque paint arguments (or perhaps you'll give up after one or two of these endeavors!). The point is, when it looks like that, all awful and repulsive, you know you're onto something. You know that if you push it further, you're going to get something more appealing. That stretch where you're taking something from the maggot-infested stage to something that wouldn't make you throw up if you saw it leaning against your wall is when you're really improving as an artist. This is where you get to learn a bit more about your style as an artist and your true aesthetic.

I put away my water color tools (and poorly so-I still can't get my green out of the little bag I put it in...) and I pulled out the tool that I use the most in all my art; the pen. This is ironic for me. I think that I use ink in so much of my art because it also happens to be the tool of writers (although within the last few years, none of us can deny that the pen is being sorely replaced by the keys of our laptops...). Still, I've been an avid ink user for the last several years (Hi everyone. My name is Grace and I'm an inkahaulic...). Thus, I pulled off the cap and began to define shapes and pull out shade and color. It looked different than I expected but certainly better than where the piece had been before. After about two hours outside working on it, I packed up my equipment and headed home. I worked on the piece a little more at home and have some further plans for it but I figured I'd share the work in progress here now, even though it isn't fully finished, just so you get an image to go with the wad of a story I just threw at you.

Oh the leaves!!

In other news, I haven't quit drawing comics yet.

This is a life-changing comic about a life-changing thought.

In further news, I'm not having what I'd call a writing block but rather, a "good quality" writer's block. It's frustrating; I can get my word count done everyday but it's not impressive to me when this means that I hate every twist of the story I have just created. I need to get out of this funk!

Well, happy 10th of August to one and all!

*Current trunk inventory: one (1) large scratchy blanket, two (2) towels, two (2) pairs of boots, one (1) pair of old jeans, two (2) white shirts, one (1) shovel, one (1) ice scraper, one (1) wooden heart, one (1) michigan license plate, and approximately five (5) shards of glass. Just thought you might wanna know?

Newly-Discovered Hours Before 11:00am

I think my guitar playing skills are picking up a bit! This probably has a lot to do with the fact that I sit at home late at night and play music...

Anyhow, earlier on my blog I was giving out rave reviews of Fleet Foxes' new Cd "Helplessness Blues" and now, I've begun playing music off of it! Obviously, I cannot do justice to the wonderful sounds of their harmonies but I've enjoyed my tries at emulation. Hopefully my neighbors downstairs continue lending me the patience they always seem to extend with my attempts at music-making. They have been extraordinarily patient with me over the last few months. I tell you, it can be loud business getting over a break-up. I've heard no complaints from them, although I did see a decided look of concern a few months back when I brought my guitar amp past them and into the apartment. I try to keep things relatively quiet to appease us all, though. There is, after all, only so much of my own music that I can stand!

Comic-ing continues! Today, I drew the figures out before I knew what they were going to say (which I hardly ever do) and then, I just sat there for about a half hour yelling at them, "What are you guys talking about!" It was aggravating!

Say What??

It's odd to be posting this at noon on a Thursday. Yes, I'm not employed and do enjoy staying up late. Thus, it has been my habit throughout my life to take every opportunity to maximize my sleep time without cutting into my 'awake-in-the-middle-of-the-night' time. However, my sister and I got up for the second time this week to go for a run before she headed off to work. I'm no runner (or at least, not yet) but it is an exhilarating way to start the day. Plus, I've discovered breakfast, so that's good. Still, it's extraordinarily odd for me to have already finished a piece of art by noon!

Ugh...my computer is gross. Does anyone know a good way to clean a mac without frying it?

Three Down...

Well, it's going to be a long haul, folks. It's only been three days and I can tell that I'm going to struggle a bit with August. But not to worry! I'll claim the better part of it!

This is just a quick update to share with you my latest development in comic artistry! I've been looking at the styles of a lot of popular webcomics recently and trying to develop mine a little more. We'll see if this pays off. It's not easy work. And it's often very aggravating...

Wishful thinking!

Yesterday, I spent some interesting time reading the Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam! It was so beautiful...I've already established with myself that poetry is written to be spoken out loud. With the Rubaiyat, I am hereby proclaiming it a crime punishable by literary death if it is not read aloud! The verses are so beautiful and the complementing imagery is authentic and moving. I was especially moved by the following two which I'll share below:

26.

"Oh, come with old Khayyam, and leave the wise

To talk; one thing is certain, that Life flies;

One thing is certain, and the Rest is Lies;

The flower that once has blown for ever dies."

28.

"With them the Seed of Wisdom did I sow,

And with my own hand labour'd it to grow.

And this was all the Harvest that I reap'd-

'I came like Water, and like Wind I go.'"

If you just read those out loud, my work here is done! Anyhow, it was time well spent yesterday. I suppose now I'd better go finish my writing quota for the day. My words need to start behaving for me once again! Grr...

Weekend's End

An eventful and fun weekend kept me from updating! So here I am, nearly to the end of Monday and I find it a good time to publish some musings.

This past friday was the retirement party for an ex-boss of mine, someone who I respected and enjoyed working for very much. It was a good turn out and by the time we all got to speeches, you couldn't help but understand that this man meant a great deal to us all. There was a large selection of individuals from the university staff and students where I'd worked for this man, which only exposed how much one person can reach out and make an impact on others. During his speech, he reiterated a positive fact that I've heard him make before about his life which gives me a large measure of inner peace. He said that he'd been at the university for many, many years and was still waiting for the work to begin. This very honestly characterizes my thoughts on him as a boss; he always approached every event and problem with a level of calmness and joy that I admired. He really does just enjoy his life, it seems, and that pleasure in living is contagious! You can't help smiling during a conversation with him.

Beyond enjoying my time expressing the thanks I had for this man and the job he'd given me, it was just great to see a lot of old friendly faces. I spent a great deal of time with the co-workers who were able to attend, catching up as though we hadn't all seen each other within the last three months. It was good to be around them again! It also allowed me to deepen friendships that already existed, an opportunity I always relish.

Earlier in the week, a dear friend of mine and I got together to celebrate our July birthdays. By the end of the evening, our combined creativity crafted something so marvelous! We sat down to a blank canvas, put on an old cartoon that I used to watch as a child (and by the way, this is a seriously odd film!), and went crazy with some paint! The result is extraordinary and shown below!

I have a distinct topic for my next blog, which I won't be getting into now, and I'm sure it will result in a much longer discussion than I will be posting today. For now, let me say that I feel as though this past weekend has taught me something rather significant about life. Perhaps the universe gives you clues, perhaps it doesn't. But if it does, I'm certainly picking something up on my internal radar (and yes, this does mean I am a Radar Detector as the fantastic band Darwin Deez would like you all to know). There are good things afoot. Perhaps this only lends itself to a few enjoyable nights gone by. But still, I will say that patience and inner cognition can really bring your spirits up in life!